John C. Wright (johncwright) wrote,
John C. Wright

Picture Day

The last entry in my journal may have given rise to the rumor that we here at do not like swordswomen. Untrue! Vile slander! Like all other healthy oversexed Americas, we guys at Pigs-R-Us  just LOVE women with swords, especially if they are absurdly attractive young supermodels and actresses dressed in revealing costumes.

Here are a few of our favorite swordsmistresses:

Smile and say CHEESECAKE!

Zorro's Daughter

Zorro's OTHER daughter

Yet another Daughter of Zorro, more or less

Violet, the Swordfighting vampirechick of the future with her flat-space dimensional blade

Kicks buttock en masse. She can also doge bullets. Whatever. I'm a fanboy, so I will suspend my disbelief for her.

Beware the blonde of 1937! She has better form than I do.

Reincarnated Egyptian Ninja-babe.

If we can suspend disbelief for Milla Jovovich, a
s a futuristic vampirebabe, we can suspend EVEN MORE disbelief for Rachel Weisz. Maybe the ancient Egyptians REALLY HAD ninjababe-princesses in underwear fighting gladiatorial duals.

Vampirebabe huntress
(Swordswoman who hunts vampirebabes)

Vampirebabe Huntress
(Vampirebabe, that is, who hunts others)

(We realize Kate Beckinsale is not actually a swordfighter in this film, but she is dressed in a skintight leather catsuit, so she did right what the Catwoman movie did wrong, ergo we include the picture here. )

And, just so you know that, beneath all this kidding, there are real young ladies in the service, a photo of a real woman (and I mean a REAL woman) in dress uniform with her real saber. Keira Knightly, this is what you should have looked like, if you wanted to convince me you could chop off the head of a pirate:

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